I thought she loved me
by Hannah Katie
Summary: Blair and Nate agreed to marry if they had no one else. But what happens when they are married and suddenly the past comes back to haunt them. Is their marriage actually real? Chuck/Blair Blair/Nate Nate/Serena
1. Chapter 1

"I thought she loved me"

"Apparently not" Blair softened as Nate turned to her "I'm sorry Nate"

"Me too"

"She didn't mean to hurt you" Blair found herself sticking up for her best friend again, Serena just didn't know how to be in a serious relationship.

Nate smiled "you've been sticking up for her for the past 5 months surely you should have got bored by now"

"I can't help myself" Blair reached out for Nate's hand and held it in her own.

"I just want what you and Chuck have. I see how much you love each other and-"

"It's not easy Nate" Blair interrupted "sometimes I just want to go back to how it all used to be."

"When we knew exactly what we wanted and who we wanted" Nate grinned "we thought we were gonna be together forever. We even planned our own wedding"

"When did things get so complicated?" Nate raised an eyebrow at Blair, did she really have to ask "you jerk" she laughed "you and Serena ruined everything" Blair's laughter died down, she meant it, they did ruin everything.

"You wouldn't change it though would you? I mean would you swap what you have with Chuck for what you had with me?"

"Yes" Nate shook his head "I guess not" Blair sighed "what we had was special though. And I was so happy and everything seemed so easy. Well until you ruined it. Would you go back and change it if you could?"

"Yes. If I could I would go back and change it so I never slept with Serena."

"Did you always love her?"

"No I loved you. I thought I loved Serena but I didn't. Not then anyway"

"But now you do and she broke your heart."

"At least she didn't choose my best friend over me" Nate laughed squeezing Blair's hand, he could never hold it against Blair and Chuck, he loved them too much.

"You can talk" Blair giggled "you know I'm always here for you right?"

"Yeah best friends forever remember"

"And you never know if things don't work out for me and Chuck and you don't work things out with Serena we might end up getting married." Blair joked before turning serious "if we're single at the age of 29 we should get married"

"29? That's a bit young to be giving up"

"No, I want to be married by the age of 30"

"Ok. Deal. Being married to you wouldn't be that bad" Nate shook her hand.

"Hey, you're very lucky I'm offering, I could find someone else. But they wouldn't be as special as you and at least I know I can put up with you"

"That is a very good point" Nate grinned, he couldn't imagine many people putting up with Blair for as long as he had but he knew the real Blair and he never wanted to loose her.

"Don't tell Chuck"


	2. Chapter 2

I wasn't going to continue but the reviews/messages changed my mind. Thank you. So this is just another short chapter to help set the rest of the story up. I promise the next update will be longer!

* * *

10 years later

Nate pushed Blair onto the couch "don't be stupid"

"Come on Nate if we don't turn up they'll know" Blair pouted her lips hoping Nate would fall for it.

"Know what? That we got married for a pact and sleep in separate rooms" Nate sighed joining Blair on the couch.

"Now you're being stupid. We don't always sleep in separate rooms" Blair winked "and we have to go Nate. I want to show everyone how well I've done in life. I deserve the chance to show off. They'll think we're hiding something"

"And going to some stupid school reunion is gonna make you happy?"

"Yes"

"Fine, we'll go. But we'll have to get our story straight" Nate laughed as Blair jumped on him "get off me"

"We don't need a story. Just tell them the truth. We've been best friends all our life's and on my 29th birthday I proposed to you when I realised what a perfect husband you'd be and we've been together nearly a year and have never been happier"

"And am I a perfect husband?"

"You're pretty crap really" Blair squealed as Nate began tickling her and pushed her back so he was on top of her "Ok! Just stop! You're perfect. Now stop tickling me"

"You're not too bad either. I could do better for a wife-"

"Hey!" Blair tried to push him off.

"But I could also do a lot worse"

"Well you're not getting your favourite breakfast tomorrow then"

"I'm sorry babe. You know I think you're the best wife ever"

"Well you should do. I learnt to cook for you. Now get up. I need to find the perfect dress for next week." Nate moved over allowing Blair to get up and watched as she headed towards her room, he never thought he'd see the day where she was wearing jeans and fluffy slippers. Apart from the change in appearance she was still the same Blair, she wanted to make a good impression and control everything and she was still slightly neurotic but he loved her for it. Nate got up and followed her to the bedroom.

"Are you not nervous though?"

"About what?"

"What if Serena and Chuck turn up"

"They didn't turn up to our wedding so-"

"We didn't invite them"

"They never turn up for anything" Blair reminded him "and if they do then I'll just remind them how much they've missed out by not being in our lives" Blair reached for Nate's hand "they're the ones who messed up, not us. We have nothing to be ashamed for"

"I'm not ashamed, just worried"

"It will be fine. I have everything under control. Trust me" Blair turned to her wardrobe "you might as well help me pick a dress now you're in here"


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you so much for the reviews! I'm sorry it took me so long to update!

* * *

Nate sighed and nudged Blair "have you finished your work yet?"

"Don't be stupid Nate. I've only been doing it an hour. I should have already had it done but you've been distracting me all week" Blair moved to the other couch with her laptop "I have to send it to print today and one of the girls has made a mess of her article. She thinks clogs are fashionable" Blair pulled a face.

"But you promised we'd spend the day doing something fun" Nate sulked.

"We can do it tomorrow. You can come shopping with me for the reunion. I need a dress"

"I already helped you choose one"

"I decided I needed a new one. Now shut up, I can't concentrate with you talking all the time" Nate watched her as she put her full attention back on the computer screen and she began typing furiously. He laughed, he couldn't help it. He liked watching her work because of the faces she pulled. He stopped laughing as she shot a dirty look in his direction.

"Can't you just have a little break?" Nate pouted.

"Fine" Blair placed her laptop on the coffee table and folded her arms angrily "what do you want to do?"

"Nothing. Never mind"

"Nate!"

"You're angry. Just go back to your work"

"You're so frustrating" Blair picked her computer up and tried to carry on working but couldn't help but feel guilty. She put it down again "shall we get the chocolate fountain out"

Nate grinned "I love you". Blair ran to the kitchen to get everything together and managed to carry it in the lounge.

"You're gonna make me fat" she piled the chocolate and marshmallows on the table and smiled glad she'd managed to get through her past issues with her weight. Nate moved towards her when they were interrupted by a knock at their door.

"I'll get it"

"Who is it?" Blair shouted as Nate didn't return.

"Blair!" Blair was blinded by a mop of blond hair as she was knocked over in a hug "it's so good to see you!"

"S" Blair pushed her away and glanced from Nate to Serena "what are you doing here?"

"I thought it was about time I visited. I've not seen your house yet. It's huge"

"I suppose we've done well for ourselves" Nate sat down and ran a hand through his hair; he hadn't expected to open the door to Serena.

"You have. I'm sorry I didn't come to your wedding. I didn't know about it until it was too late. Mum said you hadn't bothered with invitations." Serena made herself comfortable on the couch.

"It was just a small wedding" Blair joined her. It was true, their families, Lilly, Dan, Rufus and Eric were the only guests.

"I was shocked when Mum told me. I thought you wanted the princess wedding. I-"

"How's James?" Nate interrupted. Serena had married James after only knowing him for three months but surprisingly they'd now been together for three years.

"He's ok?"

"S?" Blair always knew when she was lying.

"Things aren't going so well" she admitted looking up at Nate "he wasn't the right guy."

"What do you mean?"

"My divorce came through last night so I guess I'm a single woman again" Serena forced a smile on her face not wanting to admit how hurt she was. "We started to fight all the time. It's my fault. I missed the freedom of being single, I started going out, acting like a teenager. I messed up."

"Oh S" Blair hugged her friend whilst Nate excused himself, he didn't do girl talk.

"I just can't help myself. The worst thing now it's over I miss him so much. I miss being married."

* * *

"You're so lucky Blair" Serena dropped her shopping bags on the floor. They'd turned to retail therapy and it helped but now she was back at Blair's she couldn't stop herself from thinking about married life "being married to the man of your dreams" Blair laughed and collapsed on her bed. "Why didn't you tell me about you and Nate? I couldn't believe it when mum told me you were married"

"I'm sorry. Everything just happened so fast. I thought it might have been awkward for you"

"No, me and Nate are in the past. Tell me about it. What's it like? Is he the perfect husband?"

"I suppose" Blair closed her eyes as Serena joined her on the bed.

"Is something wrong? Are you two having problems?" Blair shook her head as she opened her eyes and caught the hopeful look on Serena's face. She sat up remembering why Serena annoyed her so much.

"He's great. He lets me do my own thing and get on with my own work but he's always there when I need him. We still have fun and I can talk to him about everything. He taught me how to cook." Serena didn't look convinced "and we have a brilliant sex life" Blair smirked.

"Yeah he's always been good"

"Well he's improved a lot." Blair smiled and stood up "do you want to see the wedding photos?" Blair grabbed the album from her shelf before Serena could answer and handed it over to her "it was such a perfect day"

"Why don't you have any pictures up in the house?"

"Oh we do" Blair lied "in Nate's room and-"

"Nate's room?"

"Yeah" Blair laughed nervously, she was out of touch with all the lieing and scheming especially when it involved someone who knew her so well. "He goes there to play his video games and he has his friends over sometimes. It keeps them out the way"

"Right" Serena continued to look through the pictures; something just didn't seem right about Nate and Blair's marriage.

* * *

"How was your day with Serena?" Nate grabbed an apple as Blair turned around.

"Nate get some clothes on" she glanced at the towel draped around him before moving up to his toned chest and finally his hair which was dripping water all over the floor.

"I will do. Why does it bother you anyway? You've seen me naked loads of times"

"I know but I'm a girl and you're really attractive. It's hard to concentrate." Blair pushed the food away, she hated cooking for one.

"So come on. Dan's gonna want all the gossip tonight"

"Are you sure you two aren't gay? Because I don't mind. I'm not one to stand in the way of true love"

"Shut up Blair" he grinned.

"It was ok until she started questioning me on our marriage. We don't have any pictures of us up and I told her you had your own room. I don't know what's happening to me. I'm not Blair Waldorf anymore"

"No you're Blair Waldorf-Archibald now"

"You know I'm quite glad her life isn't so perfect anymore"

"She seems genuinely upset though."

"She is but she'll be over it soon enough. It's Serena she'll find someone else"

"You're being a bit harsh"

"Have you forgotten all the heartbreak she caused you?"

"No but she seems different"

"Well I'm just glad that for once I'm doing better than her"

"Well at least she married for love" Nate snapped before seeing the hurt on Blair's face "I'm sorry."

"No you're right. I forgot what affect Serena has on me"

"You don't need to compete with her all the time" Nate watched as Blair sat down at the table, for a minute there he felt like he'd been transferred back to high school.

"I know. I should be a good friend to her. Show her I've moved on. Be a better person" Blair groaned "why do you have to be so nice Nate?"

* * *

"So you're married to Blair and Serena's back and she's divorced now."

"Yeah and?" Nate gulped his beer down and ordered another.

"So how do you feel? Do you still have feelings for her? Are you and Blair gonna divorce? Does she love you still?"

"I'm over her" Nate lied; he wasn't sure how he felt "And why would me and Blair divorce? Serena is obviously upset over James and Blair and I are happy and that's the end of it"

"If you say so"

"I do. Stop trying to make everything into a drama. You've been spending too much time with Blair"

"Maybe you're right"

"What about you? Are you over Serena?" Dan grinned knowing Nate was using this tactic because he felt uncomfortable over his own feelings.

"Yeah I'm over her. And Nate I love you and all but don't go there with Serena. If you hurt Blair I'll-"

"Hey nothings gonna happen between me and Serena. And do I have to remind you that me and Blair are not a real couple."

"Whatever. I'm just warning you"

"I thought you were meant to be my friend anyway not Blair's"

"Well me and Blair bonded over films. It beats our bond over beer"

"Maybe Blair's right and you are gay" Dan spat his drink out and the barman looked over disgusted "well actually she thinks we're together" Dan spat more of his drink out.

"What?"

"Don't worry. I assured her we're not. I'm not gay"

"And neither am I. And if I were you wouldn't be my type"

"Hey you wouldn't be my type either"

"Lovers tiff?" the barman smirked as Nate and Dan began denying it simultaneously.

"I'm married" Nate showed him his ring "to a woman. A hot woman" he added just to make it clear.


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you so much for the reviews. It is really helping me carry on!

* * *

Dan slouched down on the couch next to Blair "do you really think me and Nate are gay?"

"No of course not" Blair smiled and patted his hand "although it would make my life much easier"

"How?"

"I guess it would mean I wouldn't have to worry about Serena" Blair admitted, she never lied to Dan "do you think he still has feelings for her?"

"No"

"Don't lie to me Dan. You're the only person I can count on to be honest"

Dan sighed "yes I think he still has feelings for her. But I don't think it's anything to worry about"

"It is Dan. I would rather have Nate leave me for you than Serena. And both would completely ruin my reputation. I can't loose him to her." Blair blushed annoyed that she was allowing herself to get so worked up.

"It's not serious Blair. Don't make a drama out of it."

"You don't understand Dan. My life is good and I have everything planned and Serena could ruin it all. I-"

"I know but if you're not careful you'll push Nate back into her arms. You just need to calm down and trust Nate"

"You're right" Blair nodded and turned to the TV and pressed play. She just hated the thought of loosing control of her life again; she could already feel herself regressing back to her high school self. "Dan" Blair whispered "if this thing- this marriage doesn't work out we'll still be friends won't we?

"Of course we will" Dan wrapped his arm round her reassuringly "believe it or not Blair I actually love you"

"I love you a little bit too you know?"

"Just a little bit?" Dan raised his eyebrow

"I guess I love you a lot. You've become my best friend. More like my brother actually" she made herself comfortable in his arms.

"I'm always here for you Blair"

"Thank you. Now let's shut up and watch the film"

* * *

Nate lay back on the bed as Serena glanced around at her room; any sign of her old life had disappeared. It had been completely redecorated; it was almost like she'd never lived here.

"Can't you stay somewhere else?"

"I can't afford it" Serena admitted joining Nate on the bed.

"What do you mean? I saw all that shopping you did with Blair, you could buy a house if you took them all back"

"I did take them all back. This morning. I bought everything using my credit card."

Nate sat up "and Blair let you?"

"I told her I was having a few problems with the accounts. I said everything would be fine in a few days once things had been sorted with James. She thought I would have the money and be able to pay it off"

"But surely you will get some money once the divorced has been finalized?"

Serena felt her eyes fill up with tears "I gave up my job. I didn't need it. I wanted to be a proper housewife. I'm the reason we're getting divorced Nate, I ruined everything, I hurt him and I don't deserve his money"

"I'm so sorry Serena"

"Don't be, it's my own fault. I just need to get a job as quick as possible and get out of here. I did not think I was ever gonna be living with my mum again. I hate this."

"I guess life doesn't always turn out how you expect" Nate looked at Serena, part of him was desperate to reach out and touch her, comfort her but part of him was terrified that if he did there was no going back "couldn't you move in with some friends instead?"

"They'd want rent. Mums letting me live here for free" Serena sighed and stood up to start unpacking.

"What about staying with Blair and me?" Nate knew he shouldn't have said it but she was so desperate and seeing that flash of hope in her face he couldn't take the offer back.

"Are you serious?" he nodded "thank you so much. That would be amazing. I'll try and get my own place as soon as possible. This is gonna be so much fun." Serena closed her case again. "Maybe you should ask Blair first just in case"

"You're her best friend. She'd kill me for not offering"

"Well let's go now." Nate nodded and stood up, Blair was gonna kill him.

* * *

"What are you doing in here?" Blair placed her bag down on her bed.

"You're back from Dan's early aren't you?"

"I fancied an early night." Blair caught sight of Nate clothes in her walk in wardrobe "why are your clothes in there?"

"I'm moving in"

"Why?"

"To make our marriage look more real"

"Nate, what is going on?"

"I asked Serena to move in with us"

"You did what?" Blair pushed him onto the bed "why would you do that?"

"She was really upset."

"She can afford to find her own place. She doesn't need us."

"Actually she has no money"

"But all the clothes?"

"She took them back" Nate pulled Blair onto the bed next to him "I know this isn't an ideal situation but she'll be back on her own feet soon enough and we'll have the house to ourselves again"

"You do realise we're gonna have to really act like a married couple all the time now"

"Is that really the worst thing in the world?" Nate winked.

"She can't find out Nate. You can't tell her" Blair took his hand and squeezed it "promise?"

"I promise." Blair kissed his cheek lightly before heading to her bathroom "I guess I should make some space in here for you as well"

"That would be nice" Nate followed her in and reached out for her "you still don't seem ok with this" he brushed a strand of her hair out of her face.

"Well I guess mine and Serena's relationship has always been a bit up and down"

"Well maybe this will help you two get closer again"

"Maybe it will. But it also might help you and her get closer again" Blair tried to push him out "I need a shower"

"No we need to talk first" Nate managed to guide her back o the bed "you don't need to worry about me and Serena"

"I do. It's obvious you still have feelings for her. Having her living with us is gonna make this arrangement even more complicated"

"I'm over Serena" Nate lied "I am completely dedicated to this marriage Blair"

"But why should you be? With Serena-"

"Blair I don't have feeling for Serena" Nate leant in placing his lips on hers "we might as well get into the habit now." Nate grinned as Blair blushed.

"Maybe Serena living here is a good idea after all. Now I'm getting in the shower" Nate sighed heavily lying back as he heard the door close. He really had made things so much more complicated.


	5. Chapter 5

Thanks for the reviews. I'm sorry it took me so long to update. And I'm sorry if I've made any mistakes, I was watching Glee whilst typing.

* * *

"I'm so excited" Blair nudged Nate trying to wake him.

"What for?" he mumbled

"I knew you'd forget. It's the reunion tonight."

"I haven't forgotten" Nate rolled over to face Blair "it's just early"

"I know but we need a full day to prepare"

"We do?"

"Yes we need to look perfect, we need to impress"

"Well I need my beauty sleep then"

"Nate" Blair placed a hand on him before he could roll back over "this is important to me"

"I know and don't worry. Everything will be fine. You have your dream job, your trophy husband and you look amazing" Nate rolled over and Blair climbed out of bed.

"Yeah a trophy husband who acts like I don't exist. It's obvious we're not happily married Nate, everyone's goon know it's not real"

"We've managed to fool everyone else. And you were the confident one last week"

"That was before Serena arrived"

Nate sat up "what do you mean by that?"

"Since she moved in instead of acting more like a couple we've acted less like one. You're always with Serena, I hardly see you anymore, you don't touch me or look at me, and we hardly talk"

"You're jealous" Nate was half annoyed and half embarrassed, Blair was right: he'd been avoiding her trying to cover up how confused he was about Serena and his marriage. "I told you Blair, me and Serena are just friends. She's having a hard time and I'm trying to help her" Nate got up, he was never going to get back to sleep now. "I'm getting in the shower" Blair nodded and left for the kitchen.

"You're up early" Serena greeted her.

"So are you"

"Well it's the big day isn't it?"

"Yeah I suppose it is" Blair sat at the kitchen table her hunger and excitement disappearing.

"Is everything ok with you two?" Serena joined her at the table.

"Everything's fine"

"I've just noticed that you two seem a bit distant"

"We're not distant"

"You can talk to me B"

"There's nothing to talk about. I should go and get ready" Serena sighed and watched her friend leave, she seemed upset but she couldn't get Blair or Nate to talk about their marriage problems no matter how hard she tried.

* * *

Blair paced up and down; she was late for the reunion, really late. She tried ringing Nate again and got no answer. She'd gone out to pick her dress up and returned home to an empty house. Nate never returned and the car never turned up to pick her up. Blair was hoping the fact that that Serena, Nate and his suit and the car had never arrived was just a coincidence but she wasn't stupid. Blair looked at the clock, she couldn't wait any longer she had to ring Dan.

"Hey Blair, I was just about to ring you. Where are you?"

"Please tell me Nate and Serena aren't there with you?"

"Erm well-"

"Great"

"Are you still at home?"

"My husband and car didn't turn up so yes, I am still at home."

"Wait there. I'll come for you"

"Where else am I gonna go Dan? It's not like I'm gonna get a bus is it?" Blair sighed "don't bother coming for me. They obviously don't want me there. And I'm not in the mood now"

"You've been looking forward to this night for ages"

"But it's already ruined" Blair felt close to tears

"Don't let them win. I know Queen B is still in there somewhere"

"Ok. You're right. I'll see you soon"

"I'm on my way" Blair hung up her phone and looked around the lounge, Serena was taking over, her belongings were scattered everywhere and now she was taking Nate too.

* * *

"Blair, where have you been?" Serena pulled her into the group of old friends.

"I had a few problems with my car"

"Oh" Blair watched as Serena placed her hand on Nate's arm "that's our fault. We forgot to tell Harry he still had to pick you up"

"So you're on first name terms with my driver now?"

"We've just been telling these guys about your job. They already knew obviously. They all read it." Nate moved to Blair's side.

"W is my favourite magazine Blair. We knew you'd do well"

"Well people change" Blair forced a smile.

"Obviously not Serena and Nate. We always thought you two would end up together"

"Oh no"

"Definitely not"

"Actually Nate and I are married. Would you please excuse us for a moment?" Blair grabbed hold of Nate's hand and led him outside "so you had time to tell them all about my job and Dan Humphrey but not that we're married"

"I forgot"

"Just like you forgot to tell me that you were getting ready somewhere else or that I wouldn't be getting picked up"

"I'm sorry, Serena's dress was at her mum's so it was easier for her to get ready there. She thought it would be fun to get ready together" Nate reached out for Blair but she pushed him away.

"Well I'm glad someone had fun"

"Blair"

"So much for making a good impression"

"We still can"

"Just go inside"

"Blair you're over reacting"

"You don't understand. I feel like I'm loosing control of everything. Just leave me alone"

"I'm sorry" he paused at the doorway and turned to look at her "you look amazing by the way"

* * *

"Look at you, wow" Blair turned around at his words and allowed him to reach out and kiss her hand.

"I didn't expect to see you here Bass?"

"And I didn't expect to find you out here feeling sorry for yourself. You're Queen B. You have everything you've ever wished for. Enjoy it."

"You have no idea Chuck" Blair let her tears escape angry at how weak she was being.

"Trouble in paradise?" his voice was soft and kind but she could see the look of excitement in his eyes.

"I wish I knew what paradise was" Blair shivered slightly, she wanted to go back inside but she couldn't.

"Do you want to get out of here?" Chuck raised an eyebrow.

"That sounds perfect" Blair wasn't really sure what she was agreeing to but she just needed to get away from it all. She walked back through the hall trying to avoid looking at anyone.

"Blair"

"What do you want Humphrey?"

"Chuck, wait for me out front"

"Are you mad?"

"Yes" Blair looked away at Dan's frown. "I just need a break. From Nate, from Serena, from all of it"

"Then come back to mine"

"So I can ask you all about Nate and Serena and try and work out what's going on? I just want to forget about it and Chuck will help me do that. Don't worry Dan, I know what I'm doing. I'm not stupid"

"I really don't think you should be doing this"

Blair kissed him on the cheek "and that's exactly why I love you. Keep an eye on the happy couple for me" Blair glanced over at Nate and Serena, she just needed to forget about Nate for one night.

* * *

Nate did another round of the room before joining Serena again.

"What's wrong with you?"

"I can't find Blair anywhere"

"Maybe she left. You know what Blair's like, she hates not being the centre of attention"

"Yeah I suppose. She must have left with Dan because he's disappeared as well. I'm gonna try and ring them"

"Nate just leave it. Enjoy yourself." Nate shrugged Serena off and headed outside. He tried Blair first but her phone was switched off. Luckily Dan answered.

"Hey mate is Blair with you?"

"No"

"But she left with you?"

"Erm no she left with Chuck actually"

"Chuck? He was here?"

"Yeah eh turned up and found Blair and they left"

"I can't believe she would do that" Nate sighed "I've messed up haven't I?"

"No" Dan lied.

"Damn it" Nate kicked his foot against the wall "I should go. If you hear from her let me know"

"Sure mate" Nate put his phone away before finding Serena.

"Did you get hold of her?"

"Yeah she left with Dan" Nate didn't want to admit the truth to her "I think I'm gonna go as well"

"No Nate it's still early" Serena tried to get hold of him but he stepped away.

"You can take the car later. I'm gonna get a cab"

"It's ok I'll just come with you"

"I'd rather be by myself. You stay." Nate managed to push her back into a group of people before leaving. He couldn't pretend he was interested in anyone or anything other than Blair whilst knowing that she was with Chuck. Just the thought of the two of them together made him feel sick.

* * *

"I should probably get going" Blair looked around, she couldn't believe Chuck had brought her to some sleazy hotel room "are you sure you're ok? I mean this isn't up to your usual taste" Blair sat down on the bed next to Chuck.

"Why have you sat down again then?" Chuck ignored her question and smirked, he knew she wasn't ready to go home.

"I'm so angry with him" Chuck rolled his eyes as the conversation turned to Nate again.

"Blair I invited you back here to talk about you not Nate"

"Nothing's gonna happen Chuck" Blair knew what he was hoping for.

"Of course it is. You can't resist me"

"I'm married now"

"To a jerk that doesn't realise how special you are"

"Every marriage has its problems"

"Ours wouldn't"

Blair laughed "you're mental. I've never seen a relationship as messed up as ours was. Marrying you would have been the biggest mistake of my life"

"No it wouldn't"

"Chuck" Blair put up a warning hand as he moved closer "don't do this. Don't make things more complicated than it already is"

"We belong together" he pushed Blair's hand away as he leant in to kiss her, she didn't bother fighting it, and she didn't have the energy. And it was nice to kiss someone that wasn't Nate where she didn't have to think how little or much it meant to him or herself or how it would affect their arrangement. This was just a kiss.

"I forgot how cheesy you were. You always had a way of making me feel like I lived in some soap opera. We belong together" Blair scoffed.

"This isn't a joke" Chuck leant in again but Blair avoided him this time "you should stay the night"

"No I should go home"

"It's two in the morning, how are you planning on getting home?"

"Harry will come for me unless he's busy with Serena and Nate. It's what I pay him for."

* * *

"What time do you call this?" Blair jumped as she closed the bedroom door and came face to face with Nate.

"I thought you'd be asleep"

"I was worried about you. You just disappeared from the party. I had to ring Dan"

"And he told you where I was"

"What were you thinking Blair?"

"I was thinking that you wouldn't miss me" Blair pushed past towards the bathroom.

"Did you sleep with him?" Blair stopped "did you?"

"It's none of your business"

"We're married of course it is"

"So it's ok for you when it comes to Serena but not me. You're an idiot Nate"

"Me and Serena haven't done anything!" Nate just wanted to shake her.

"But you've wanted too"

"No" Nate shook his head "no I haven't"

"Don't lie to me"

"I'm not" Blair leant against the wall and watched him; she couldn't tell if he was telling the truth.

"Arguing was never part of the deal"

"Neither was Chuck" Nate closed his eyes ignoring the hurt on Blair's face. She slammed the bathroom door behind her and he climbed into bed. He didn't know what was wrong with him, he'd spent the whole night thinking about Blair and Chuck and wanting her home and now he'd made things worse. Nate heard the bathroom door opening again and a couple of minutes later he felt Blair climb in beside him.

"I didn't sleep with him. I was just angry with you. I needed to get away"

"I'm sorry"


	6. Chapter 6

Your reviews make me smile so much and I am trying to update as soon as possible!

* * *

"Nate. I'm so sorry about last night" Blair joined him at the table "I shouldn't have just left like that. Especially not with Chuck"

"No it's my fault. I'm sorry for how I've been acting recently"

"It's ok. I'm just tired of all the arguing. It's not us, we always get along"

"So we're ok?" Nate reached for Blair's hand and stroked it softly.

"Yeah we are. No more arguing though" Blair smiled "where's Serena?"

"I asked her to stay out last night, give us some space"

"You did?"

"Yeah. And I've also arranged for Harry to pick us up. We're going shopping this morning, eating dinner at your favourite restaurant, then more shopping"

"Really?" Blair was just waiting for him to mention Serena in the day's plans.

"Just the two of us"

"It sounds perfect" Blair made her way round to sit on Nate's knee "I've missed you"

"I've not been anywhere" Nate kissed the top of Blair's head before pushing her off "are you ready then?" Blair nodded her mind still on Nate and Serena, he didn't even realise what effect Serena had on him. "How was last night? I don't mean the reunion, I know I ruined it for you. How was Chuck?" Nate helped Blair get her coat on and led her outside to the car.

"It was ok" she climbed in next to him "it was weird seeing him again"

"Do you still have feelings for him?"

"No"

"Really I don't" Blair had surprised herself with her reaction to Chuck but unlike Nate she'd grown up and moved on.

"Are you sure? You just seemed really weird last night"

"I was upset with you Nate. Seeing Chuck didn't bother me"

"I don't believe you" Nate watched Blair closely "after everything you guys went through I don't believe that you're over him as much as you say you are"

"Are you talking about me and Chuck here or you and Serena?" Blair snapped.

"Don't bring Serena up again"

"I'm over him Nate because I still haven't forgiven him for everything he did to me. I never want to be with someone like that again"

"Ok" he still wasn't convinced

"Let's not mention Serena or Chuck again. They're banned for the day. Deal?"

"Deal"

* * *

"So Blair left with you last night?" Serena watched Chuck closely as he sipped his drink, he seemed smug about something.

"Yep"

"Nate told me she left with Dan" she couldn't believe he'd lied to her or that she hadn't noticed.

"I don't think they want to admit that they aren't as perfect as they make out"

"This whole situation seems so" Serena tried to find the right word "fake"

"What do you mean?"

"They have no pictures of their wedding up and it was such a small wedding. The opposite of what Blair dreamed off. Nate has his own room. Blair told me it was where he went to hang out like a boy's room. But I went in. It has a bed and a wardrobe and most of Nate's stuff in it. It's almost like he was staying in there. And I've hardly seen them interact since I arrived."

"So you think their breaking up?" Chuck didn't bother to hide the hope in his voice.

"Maybe. To be honest I haven't seen any sign of them actually being together" Serena admitted "so I don't really know what to think. Did something happen between you and Blair last night?"

"Certainly not what I wanted to happen but we did kiss"

"How could she?"

"Well if what you're saying is true Blair and Nate are over"

"But I don't know Chuck. And they are still technically together. Nate was your best friend Chuck, just stay away from Blair until we know for certain" Serena warned, she didn't want to see Nate get hurt.

"Nate gave up any rights to being my best friend when he married Blair. It should be me and Blair and you and Nate" Chuck could see Serena wavering "I know you still love him"

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't have feelings for him but I don't want to play a part in their break up. I've already ruined my own marriage. And I love them both so much, they're still my best friends."

"I'd hardly call you and Blair best friends"

"I can't hurt her, I won't. I want her to be happy more than anything" Serena meant it.

"Why are you living with them then? You're doing more damage than me"

"I miss them. I can't live at home again and I have no one else to turn too. It's not like you can help me"

"I have my money problems under control"

"How are you gonna give Blair what she wants?"

"She has enough money for both of us"

"How are you gonna get her to forgive you?"

"She can't hate me forever"

"It's Blair. She's the most stubborn person I've ever met."

"We're more alike than you think. I know you Serena. You won't give up until you've got what you want so Nate will be yours and me and Blair will be back together."

"I'm nothing like me"

"You might not realise it but you're doing everything in your power to get Nate away from Blair"

* * *

"Wow" Serena watched as Blair managed to carry her bags through to her room "do you actually have any money left?"

"Nate wanted me to buy everything I liked. He was trying to make it up to me for last night" Blair collapsed on the couch next to Serena "I've had the most amazing day"

"Where is Nate?"

"At Dan's" Blair closed her eyes, she was so tired, she'd dragged Nate around every shop, it had been perfect almost as if Chuck and Serena had never returned. She hadn't thought about them once. She didn't think anything could ruin her good mood, she was even warming to Serena.

"So you and Nate are good then?" Serena assumed he was the reason for the smile that had left Blair's face since she arrived.

"We're brilliant" Blair forced her eyes open to look at Serena "thanks for giving us some time to ourselves. We needed it"

"No problem" Serena managed a smile even though she could feel herself feel a little bit disappointed and ashamed for feeling like that. She hated to admit that she didn't want Blair and Nate to sort things out "you do love Nate don't you?" Blair laughed nervously; no one had ever questioned her feelings for Nate before.

"Of course I do"

"I know you were with Chuck last night. I also know that you kissed Chuck, he told me" Blair didn't know what to say "have you told Nate?"

"No" Blair felt her happiness fading "are you going to tell him?"

"It's not my place. I can't believe you would do this to him"

"I'm sure that Chuck didn't tell you the full story"

"No he didn't"

"I was upset about Nate. I went with Chuck to get a break. I spent of the night whinging about Nate. And then Chuck kissed me. I was too tired to fight. It didn't mean anything. I made it clear that I was with Nate and I left."

"If it didn't mean anything to you why haven't you told Nate?"

"It would mean something to Nate. I don't want to hurt him"

"I don't know if I can just sit back and watch you ruin each other like this" Serena couldn't look at Blair anymore, she was unsure whether she was thinking of both of them or whether she was actually doing this because she wanted Nate for herself. She hated Chuck for putting those thoughts in her head. "If you don't tell him I will"

"You just said you wouldn't"

"I know but I don't trust that you won't go back to Chuck, I can't watch you hurt Nate like this knowing that I could have stopped it at the beginning"

"I'm not gonna start an affair. I hate Chuck. You know me Serena, I don't forgive easily"

"Since I came back you and Nate have hardly been together. You're not happy Blair. You've had a good day today but that doesn't solve all your problems"

"It's not like that. We always have good days, always. We're just having a bad week" Blair could feel herself about to snap as Serena's look of sympathy.

"I know how it feels but it will be better for you and Nate for yourself if you just admit it to yourselves. Your marriage is over"

"That's what you want isn't it?" Blair stood up "you just want Nate for yourself"

"Blair"

"No. I'm fed up of you trying to take everything from me" I want you out of my house" Blair ran a hand through her hair as she heard the front door open and close.

"What's going on?" Nate sensed the tension straight away.

"You were quick"

"I said I would be. I was just picking something up." Nate looked from Serena's tear stricken face to Blair's messy hair; she always messed with her hair when she was angry "have you two been arguing?"

"Blair's chucking me out"

"She's trying to split us up"

"Serena you're not going anywhere. Will you just excuse us for a moment?" Nate led Blair into the bedroom "how could you do that to her? She's our friend"

"If she was our friend she wouldn't be trying to split us up"

"Don't be so childish Blair"

"I should have known we would end up arguing as soon as we got back. Can't you see what she's doing to us?"

"It's not her Blair it's you" Nate watched as Blair went to her wardrobe and began stuffing clothes into a bag "what are you doing Blair?"

"I'm going to stay at Dan's"

"For how long?" Nate tried to stop Blair putting more clothes into her bag.

"I don't know. I just can't stay here. Not with you and Serena here"

"Blair we can sort this out"

"We were having such a good day but you had to ruin it. You always pick her"

"I'm not picking her"

"Well chuck her out, she can stay at her mums and I can stay here" Nate didn't say anything which gave Blair her answer "you don't even realise what she does to you" Blair finished her packing.

"Where are you going?" Serena followed Nate and Blair to the door.

"Don't bother calling me. Not tonight anyway"

* * *

Dan opened his door and pulled Blair into a hug, she was a mess. Nate had rang him to warn him what had happened. He took her bag and managed to lead her to the couch.

"I'm s-sorry. I shouldn't have j-just turned up" Blair sobbed.

"Don't be stupid"

"I should have r-rang and asked if I-I could stay"

"Nate rang"

"He did?" Blair tried to regain control of her emotions and pulled away from Dan's arms.

"He's worried about you"

"I shouldn't have tried to chuck Serena out. I'm such a bad friend. I lost it; I'm just so tired of everything."

"What happened?"

"Chuck kissed me last night. And Serena knows. She threatened to tell him"

"You kissed Chuck?"

"It meant nothing" Blair wiped her tears away "I'm scared that I'm gonna loose Nate to Serena and I'm gonna be by myself. And Serena said she was gonna tell him and I know me and Nate aren't really together but I panicked. I don't want him to find out and go running to Serena"

"You'll never be by yourself"

"I'm loosing myself Dan. I don't know what's real and what isn't anymore"

"Just go and get some sleep. You'll feel better in the morning"

"Thank you Dan" Blair picked her bag up "do you think I'm being stupid?"

"No" he thought Nate was being stupid for not realising what was right in front of him.


	7. Chapter 7

This chapter was gonna be longer but after all the reviews I wanted to update as quickly as possible. Thank you so much. There's gonna be a lot more drama in the next chapter and I promise I'll try to update soon. :-)

"Are you feeling any better?" Dan passed Blair a drink as she sat down at the table.

"Yeah, I guess"

"You remember that we have the big family meal today?"

"Yep and Serena will be there"

"And Chuck" Blair nearly spat her drink out "he let Serena know and she told Nate and he just text me to let me know"

"I still have my phone switched off" Blair wondered whether Nate had bothered to try and contact her even thought she told him not too.

"He wants to know if you're still going."

"My mum and Cyrus will be there. I have to go"

"Are you sure it's a good idea"

"I did a lot of thinking last night" Blair ignored Dan's question "I don't think me and Nate ever realised what we were getting ourselves into. We should have listened to you"

"I didn't know you as well last year. I didn't know how well you and Nate work together"

"We don't at the moment" Blair had never even let it cross her mind that Serena and Chuck would come back into the picture "we were stupid to think it would be easy, that we'd be happy"

"But you have been up to now haven't you?" Dan knew she had.

"No" Blair felt tears slip down her cheeks "yes. It's been the best year of my life."

"Once Serena and Chuck are gone it will be like that again. Just wait" Dan wanted her to be convinced, he hated seeing her so lost.

"I can't pretend this week never happened. Things have changed between us. Nate's in love with Serena and I'm the only thing in his way of them being together. I don't want him to end up hating me for trapping him"

"Then end things" Dan watched the panic in Blair's face, she wasn't going to do that. "Or not, calm down"

"I'm just not ready to loose him yet. I-I- he means so much to me. I know it's selfish but I need him" Blair groaned and rested her head on the table "so basically I spent the whole night going back and forth. Should I divorce him so he can be happy and me miserable or stay with him and end up miserable anyway."

"They both end in miserable"

"But at least if I stay with Nate I might be able to prolong the happiness a bit more. And I know Nate won't leave me so it's up to me to decide" Dan knew she was right. Nate would never actually leave Blair for Serena; he was the type of guy that let others make the big decisions for him. Blair normally loved it but not this time.

"Did you actually get any sleep last night?" he didn't know what else to suggest, it was hard being best friends with two people who never admitted how they actually felt.

* * *

Blair waited as Nate climbed out the car "why are you always late? I thought you'd come with Serena"

"I thought it would look weird if I turned up without you." Nate leant back in the car for something "and I bought you something which is why I'm late" he handed Blair a photo frame with a picture of them on their wedding day. Blair felt tears spring to her eyes instantly, you couldn't even guess that it was fake; they were both staring into each others eyes as if they were madly in love.

"It's beautiful" Blair leant over and kissed Nate's cheek softly.

"I thought it was about time we had some pictures up" Nate took hold of her hand "you're the most important person in my life. If I have to choose between you and Serena I will. And I'll choose you. I'll always choose you. I want you to come back home"

"Really?"

"Yes" Nate took the photo frame and placed it back in the car "now let's get inside. They'll think we're not coming"

"Blair, Nate you two look wonderful" Eleanor hugged her daughter and son in law before allowing them to greet everybody else.

"Are you ok Blair? You look like you've been crying"

"Nate just reminded me of how lucky I am to have him" Blair squeezed Nate's hand and watched Chuck and Serena exchange glances, she wasn't going to let them win tonight.

"You've turned her soft" Cyrus laughed.

"I never thought I'd see the day" Lilly guided Blair over to the dining table "now lets make ourselves comfortable and we can all catch up" Blair quickly positioned herself in between Nate and Dan and facing Jenny and Eric.

"So tell us about the reunion" Eleanor tried to start up a conversation.

"Oh no, we won't bore you with that"

"It was amazing" Serena gushed "Nate and I really enjoyed catching up with everyone" Blair wished she'd sat nearer to Serena now so she could kick her under the table.

"Where were you Blair?"

"I was-" she looked at Nate for help "there"

"She left with me so she wasn't there for long" Chuck smirked as everyone looked from him to Blair. They all knew the history they shared.

"Sorry for asking but why the hell would you leave with Chuck if it wasn't to sl-"

"She was tired" Nate cut Jenny off "and she was upset with me. I'm not always the world's best husband" Nate laughed awkwardly.

"It is interesting though." Serena smiled "was it weird? It's understandable if you still have feelings for each other, you were in love once"

"So were we" Dan leant towards Serena "and there's definitely no feelings left there. People do move on don't they Blair?"

"Well I never fully moved on from Nate but that's because we were meant to be" Blair smiled sweetly and stroked Nate's face lovingly; she knew she was getting to them. "But yeah I have moved on from Chuck." The adults sat back not wanting to get involved with whatever was going on.

"But when we kissed you must have felt something" Chuck was going to wait until the end of the meal to drop the bombshell but the way Blair was looking at Nate was getting to him, he couldn't last any longer.

"What kiss?" Nate looked from Chuck smug face to Blair's guilty face.

"Blair" Eleanor couldn't keep quiet any longer "what's going on?"

"I think she told me she felt something a little like hatred" Dan knew by saying this Nate would realise that he knew but he had to help Blair.

"I told her to tell you Nate but she wouldn't. And she was going to kick me out if I said anything" Dan rolled his eyes as Serena pouted at Nate trying to look like the innocent one.

"This is pathetic" Blair stood up "I'm leaving. Come on Nate." He didn't move. "Well I'm going". Blair headed for the lift with Chuck following.

"Leave me alone Chuck"

"I'm sorry I had to do it"

"And why's that?" Blair rushed out as the lift doors opened and headed for fresh air.

"I love you Blair" he tried to reach out for her but she pushed him backwards.

"No Chuck. I want to know why you and Serena won't leave us alone. If you loved me you'd let me be happy with Nate"

"You'll never be happy with Nate" Chuck managed to get hold of her and pulled her close "I love you and I know you love me too. Just say it"

"This whole thing" Blair managed to get out of his grip "this situation is just too complicated." Nate watched as Blair rushed off after Chuck's words hating himself for being the reason behind her unhappiness. If he stopped being selfish and let her go then she could be with Chuck and wouldn't have to lie anymore.

* * *

"I knew I'd find you here" Nate sat down on the steps that they'd spent so many of their high school years on. He gently wiped Blair's tears away. "I'm sorry today was a disaster. I know you wanted to impress your mum"

"Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything wrong" they sat in silence for a couple of minutes not sure how they should really be feeling. "You can't be angry at me for kissing Chuck. We're not really together"

"That doesn't stop you from being jealous of Serena" Nate pointed out.

"I'm just worried she'll realise we're fake. I want to do better than her for once" Blair looked at Nate "are you angry that I kissed him?"

"No" Nate lied "I'm upset that you didn't tell me. Dan and Serena both knew. You've always spoke to me about everything"

"It wasn't a big deal. It didn't mean anything"

"It's Chuck. It's always a big deal" and it always means something. Nate wrapped an arm around Blair as she shivered.

"I'm sorry"

"I know"

"So we're still ok?"

"If you forgive me for last night I'll forgive you"

"I forgave you as soon as I saw you today" Blair leant her head on his shoulders "thanks for all the voicemail messages by the way. I told you not to bother trying"

"I know you. You would have been angry if I hadn't" Blair laughed gently, he knew her too well.

"I've never been able to stay angry with you for long"

"Good" Nate kissed the top of her head lightly "I hate it when we're not friends"

"Can we go home now? And pretend this week never happened?"

"Sounds like the perfect plan" Nate pulled her up "shall I ring Henry?"

"No lets walk" Blair held her hand out for Nate to take.

"I told Serena that she's not welcome in our house tonight and that she come tomorrow to pack her bags" Nate smiled as Blair opened her mouth wide.

"You did what?"

"You're right. She's coming between us and I'm fed up of it. Like I said I'll always choose you" Blair squealed and hugged him.

"I love you Nate" Blair blushed "as a friend and fake husband of course". Nate took her hand again and continued walking thinking over why part of him was disappointed at being labelled as a friend again and was jealous of Chuck.


	8. Chapter 8

Shortish chapter because I'm getting ready for the next one. It's a big one! I hope you enjoy and thank you for all the reviews!

* * *

"Where's Blair?" Serena followed Nate into the house.

"At work" Nate sat back down and Serena hovered by him "do you need me to supervise why you pack?"

"So you really meant it then?" Serena sat next to him and he stood up "why?"

"Are you that stupid Serena? The way you embarrassed Blair like that in front of everyone, it made me realise that Blair was right, we need you out"

"I didn't know Chuck was going to tell everyone about the kiss" she was telling the truth. Chuck she wouldn't go along with it. She just wanted to make Blair feel uncomfortable and then she got a bit carried away "believe me Nate I wouldn't do that"

"Ok" Nate sighed and I sat down a safe distance away from her.

"But you still said some horrible things. She was really upset"

"I know" Serena examined Nate "you don't seem too upset about the kiss"

"I am but it made me realise a few things that I needed to deal with"

"Like?" Nate shook his head "so are you and Blair ok now?"

"Yeah I guess so" Nate leant back; he was finding it harder and harder to lie about his relationship with Blair.

"Remember when you came to me that time. I was dating my professor who happened to be Ben's cousin when really I was just using him because I couldn't decide between you and Dan"

"I remember"

"You said you wanted us to try again"

"And you told me you needed to be single to sort your head out"

"I lied. Just before you turned up I had rang Dan. I wanted to be with him"

"And the point is?"

"There's always someone else when it comes to us. Blair, Dan, Tripp, Juliet. My dad" Serena moved closer "it's never the right time for us"

"Maybe someone's trying to tell us something"

"Maybe you're right because even after everything I still love you"

"I meant that we shouldn't be together" Nate jumped up from the couch as Serena moved closer.

"You don't love Blair. I know it. It's time for us Nate. Just the two of us"

"You're deluded" Nate froze as Serena backed him against the wall.

"I love you. That's why I'm here, why I did that to Blair last night, I was jealous. I messed my marriage with James up because I realised I wanted you."

"You're too late"

"It's never too late for us" Serena pressed her lips to Nate's and felt him weakening "I know you still love me"

"No I don't" but maybe he could learn to again. Nate helped Serena unbutton the rest of his shirt and removing it. She pulled her own top off as he guided her back towards the couch. Blair watched from the doorway as Nate and Serena continued to undress each other, she knew he still loved her. She rushed back to the door closing it as quietly as possible not that they had noticed when she came in. Nate pulled away from Serena "did you hear that?"

"What?" Serena tried to pull him back.

"It sounded like the door"

"You're hearing things" Serena groaned as Nate stood up.

"I can't do this. Not to Blair"

"Nate, please"

"I can't believe you would do this to her" Nate watched as guilt clouded Serena's face "so you do still care for her"

"Of course I do I-"

"Just pack your things and leave"

* * *

"Careful Blair" Chuck grabbed hold of her just as she was about to run into him "where are you rushing too?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm waiting for Serena. Rufus let us borrow his car to pick up her stuff" he nodded towards the car he'd been sat in until he caught sight of Blair.

"You might as well go, she's gonna be a while. And I don't think Nate's gonna chuck her out anymore" Blair tried to walk away but Chuck stopped her. "I just need to get away from here"

"What did you see in there?" Chuck stroked her face as he noticed her tears "why are you so upset?"

"They were kissing and" Blair shook her head trying to get the image out of her head "on my couch"

"Do you want me to go in there? Sort Nate out?"

"No" Blair laughed to herself, why did she have to care about him so much.

"He deserves it" Chuck would have gone in there anyway but he didn't want to leave her alone "do you want to come back to my hotel?"

"No way"

"I don't mean for that. How bad do you think I am?" Chuck rolled his eyes as Blair continued to look at him in disgust "ok it did cross my mind. It would be good revenge on Nate"

"I don't need to get revenge." Blair sighed "you won't understand. I need Dan"

"What is it with you and Humphrey?"

"Can you give me a lift? Please?"

* * *

"Chuck dropped you off in my dad's car?" Dan raised an eyebrow "and he told you he loves you"

"Yep. After the whole family meal disaster he followed me out and told me. What did I ever see in him?"

"You're asking the wrong person" Dan and Blair made themselves comfortable on the couch.

"I need to get myself a new girlfriend. It's safe to say mine and Serena's friendship is over"

"You have me instead. I'm not a girl but I'm a good listener"

"You're amazing Dan but sometimes it would just be nice to have a girl to talk too. And you're best friends with Nate. It can get awkward sometimes."

"Serena was friends with Nate too"

"And that's why we're not friends anymore. Back in the day though Serena used to put me before Nate" Blair chuckled "back in the day. I sound like such an old women" Blair continued to laugh whilst Dan watched in amusement "I didn't even know Chuck could drive"

"Blair, are you ok?"

"Yeah I'm great"

"Did Chuck give you something?"

"Like what?" Blair burst out laughing.

"Drugs or are you drunk?"

"I caught Nate and Serena together" Blair stopped laughing and let her tears slip out.

"You're drunk aren't you?" Dan handed Blair the tissues his amusement turning to worry.

"No I'm not" Blair looked at Dan seriously "I think I'm going crazy" now it was Dan's turn to laugh "it's not funny, I'm being serious"

"Ok I'm listening. I won't laugh"

"When I saw Nate and Serena together I had the urge to rip her off. I was so jealous"

"Well he is your friend" Dan offered an explanation when she didn't continue.

"It's more that that. I can't believe I've been so stupid. I'm an idiot"

"Erm it would help if you told me what you're talking about"

"I love him Dan. I think I'm in love with Nate" Blair lay back stretching her legs out "I think I've gone crazy. You need to ring the doctor."

"Don't be so overdramatic. What are you going to do about it?"

Blair sat up "what do you mean what am I going to do about it? Why aren't you shocked?"

"Should I be?"

"I just told you I was in love with Nate so yeah you should be"

"It was obvious Blair. I've been waiting for you to admit it for ages"

"I need a drink, a strong one" Blair watched as Dan left the couch. How could he have known when she didn't? He returned with her drink "you never hinted to me that you thought that."

"I have loads of times. It's called denial Blair" Dan took a gulp of his own drink; it was going to be a long night. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know. I can't tell him. I'll definitely loose him for good."

"Blair I think he feels the same way. He's just too scared to admit it"

"You didn't see him" Blair's eyes filled up with tears again "he loves her, I know it. I'm not sure if I can stand in his way. The only thing worse than loosing him is if he hates me"

"What do you mean you can't stand in his way?"

"I know what I have to do"


	9. Chapter 9

Thank you for the reviews. I'm gonna try and finish this story this week because I have exams soon and need to concentrate on revision. I really hope you're enjoying it. If you have any ideas on the ending let me know. And I'm sorry if there is any mistakes in this chapter I didn't have much time to check it.

* * *

Blair opened her bedroom door slowly nervous about what she would find. She peeped round the door and saw that no one was there so she went over to inspect, it looked like only one person had slept in it. Blair's phone buzzed in her pocket as she made her way to Nate's room and banged the door open. His bed hadn't been slept in. She continued to ignore her phone as she barged into the spare room, it was empty, and all Serena's belongings were gone so Nate really had chucked her out. Blair grabbed her phone tempted to answer. Nate had been ringing her all night wondering why she hadn't returned home. Blair pressed answer.

"Blair, is that you?"

"Yeah"

"Where are you?"

"At home" Blair hoped he wasn't with Serena "where are you?"

"At Dan's looking for you" they must have just missed each other

"We need to talk Nate"

"I know. Serena's gone; we can sort things out again"

"Just come home"

"I'm coming now" Blair cut Nate off as she heard a knock at the door.

"What do you want?" she greeted Chuck.

"It's nice to see you too" he pushed her aside and walked in.

"Don't sit on the couch" Blair shouted grabbing hold of Chuck just as he was about to sit down "we don't know what's happened on there"

"It really doesn't bother me" Chuck sat down leaving Blair stood, she didn't feel safe sitting anywhere.

"So what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to check on you"

"So why didn't you go to Dan's?"

"I know you Blair, you're not one to sit around. I knew you'd want to see if Serena was here."

"All her stuffs gone"

"I know. She rang me just after I'd dropped you off. She seemed pretty upset actually when I went back for her"

"You didn't tell her I'd seen did you?" Chuck shook her head "thank you"

"Have you seen Nate yet?"

"No but he's on his way home now so lets make this quick"

"I knew you couldn't resist me forever Waldorf"

"Chuck" Blair rolled her eyes; she forgot how irritating he could be. She didn't know how she found him attractive when she was younger.

"So you're leaving Nate then?"

"It's none of your business"

"Of course it is. Nate is the only thing standing in our way of being together"

"What about the fact that I'm not interested"

"I don't believe you"

"No you wouldn't would you"

"You're staying with him aren't you?" Chuck stood up "you don't deserve to be second best Blair"

"Just stay out of it Chuck. You have no idea what Nate and I have been through"

"Tell me then Blair. I just want to know what's going on in your head" Chuck reached out for her but she pushed him away.

"I don't want to talk about it to you Chuck"

"You're Blair Waldorf-"

"Archibald. Don't forget that bit"

"The point is you don't let people treat you like this. I can't believe you're considering staying with him"

Blair ran her hands through her hair "have you forgotten how many chances I gave you? You did so many things to hurt me. Before you and Serena arrived me and Nate were happy. He never hurt me the way you did"

"You can't just ignore what Nate and Serena did"

"I don't know exactly what they did." Blair sat down on the edge of the couch pretending it didn't bother her "and I'm not going to ignore it"

"I want you to be with me Blair"

"Well you don't always get what you want"

"I do" Chuck knelt down in front of Blair and took hold of her hand "and I need you. I can give you everything you've ever wanted"

"I already have it. I have the job I've always wanted, the husband, the house and money. What can you give me Chuck? A lot more pain that I don't want"

"You missed happiness from that list"

"I was happy. I am"

"Liar"

"I will be happy" Blair sighed "how are you planning on making me happy anyway? You have no money"

"So you have noticed?"

"You took me to a sleazy hotel, I definitely noticed."

"When I lost you Blair I lost everything. I messed up"

"You've always been messed up"

"Everything's finally coming back together. All I need is you"

"What do you mean?" Chuck sat up next to her still keeping hold of her hand.

"I've got a job"

"Really? Where?" Blair smiled genuinely proud that Chuck might finally be growing up "what is it?"

"It's the usual, managing hotels, a couple of bars. But it's in France and I'm leaving in a couple of days."

"France?"

"Blair come with me"

"Are you mad?"

"I love you Blair."

"This is stupid Chuck"

"Just forget about everything from the past. Let's start again. Be who we're meant to be."

"Stop talking in movie clichés!" Blair jumped up "everything I ever loved about you is driving me mad"

"Blair have you been taking something?" Chuck tried to soothe her.

"Why does everybody think that?" Blair collapsed on the couch forgetting that she didn't want to touch it. "You should go Chuck. Nate should be back any second"

"Are you sure he hasn't ditched you and gone to Serena's. He should have been back by now"

"Shut up"

"Ok I'm gonna go and let you calm down. Just think about the France offer. It's a good one"

"You have no chance"

* * *

"I'm sorry it took me so long"

"Where have you been?"

"I had to stop and think" he'd spent the whole night thinking. And then he'd arrived and couldn't pluck up the courage to actually come in and then he saw Chuck leave and realised what he had to do.

"Thinking's over rated"

"Why didn't you come home last night?"

"I needed thinking time" Blair smiled slightly as Nate joined her on the couch "thinking isn't an attractive look on you" she reached and stroked his face "you look like you didn't get much sleep last night"

"I didn't get any. I just have so much on my mind. It feels like it's about to explode"

"So Serena didn't stay?"

"No" Nate looked confused "why would she?"

"I-I just thought she would have after what happened" Blair didn't really want to spell it out.

"What do you mean?" Nate thought back to the events with Serena "I heard the door. It was you weren't it?" Blair nodded "nothing happened. Well we kissed but that's it. I thought I heard the door and I realised what was happening and I chucked her out."

"So you didn't?" Blair patted the couch not wanting to finish her sentence.

"No we didn't"

"Serena felt guilty afterwards"

"She did. You should talk to her"

"I can't believe you. You always defend her" Blair shook her head and pulled her wedding ring off, she was even more certain about her decision now.

"What are you doing?"

"None of this was part of the plan Nate"

"I know" Nate took his own ring off.

"You're not even going to put up a bit of a fight?" Blair raised her eyebrow not wanting to admit she was a little disappointed.

"I don't want to do this. But we can't carry on like this. You're right. This arguing, all the tears" Nate wiped Blair's face "it's not fair on either of us"

"I can't believe it's really over" Blair leant into Nate's embrace "I miss you already"

"I love you so much" Nate kissed the top of her head hoping by setting her free she would finally get what she wanted and she could be happy with Chuck.

"We're still best friends right?"

"Of course" they sat in silence for a while enjoying each others company for a little longer.

"So what happens now?"

"I'll stay at Dan's for a while and look for my own place"

"I can't kick you out"

"I know how much you love this house."

"Thank you" Blair let more tears escape "I'm such a mess" she pushed him away "I can't stop crying with you hugging me like that"

"I'm sorry. I can't help it" he pulled her back; he didn't want to ever let go.

"You can leave your stuff here for now. Just take what you need and come back for the rest. There's no rush"

"Thanks"

"Do you regret marrying me?"

"No. Not one little bit"

"Good because I've loved every second of it apart from this month."

Nate lifted Blair's head up so she was looking at him "I'm so sorry about everything. I never wanted to hurt you"

"You haven't" Blair lied, in fact he hurt her every time he chose Serena. And every time he told her he loved her because she knew he didn't mean it in the same way she did.

"You mean so much to me. I just want you to be happy"

"I will be" Blair stood up "should I help you pack some stuff?"

"Blair" Nate pulled her into a hug again "I'm gonna miss this"

"I can't believe I'm getting a divorce" Blair laughed "this is not gonna look good for me. If it ruins my reputation you don't mind if I spin a few stories about what a bad husband you were, do you?"

"Blair"

"Don't worry I'm joking" Blair followed him into the bedroom so he could pack a few things.

"If you're that desperate to keep a good image we might as well just stay married"

"And end up hating each other" Blair turned serious again "I don't want you to ever hate me"

"That would be impossible" Nate grabbed a few of his things from Blair's wardrobe "so are we just gonna tell everyone it was a mutual break up?"

"Yeah, we grew apart, fell out of love and so on."

"You make everything sound so easy Blair"

"I wish everything was" Blair watched as Nate finished packing his stuff.

"I guess this is it then" Nate headed to the door.

"I'll see you whenever then. I don't really know how fake marriage break ups are meant to work"

"How about I'll ring you tomorrow? Maybe we could meet for a drink."

"Sounds good to me" Blair kissed his cheek gently before shutting the door behind him. She paced up and down for a few minutes not really knowing what to do. She hoped she had done the right thing but she didn't feel like it. She just hoped Nate waited a while before getting with Serena. She needed time to get used to acting like just a friend to Nate before she had to pretend she was happy for him and Serena. She sat down on the couch her tears flowing as she realised she'd really lost him. She knew she had to end things but it didn't make it any easier. Nate sat down in Dan's car, he must have guessed what would be happening which is why he forced Nate to take the car. Nate took his phone out and sent him a text letting him know he'd be staying for a couple of nights. He slammed his fist against the steering wheel as he felt tears slip down his cheeks. He felt like everything was ending, the only thing keeping him from falling apart was the fact that Blair could finally be happy. He'd stopped it for long enough. It was time for both of them to move on.


	10. Chapter 10

I hope you enjoy this chapter. I promise I'll try to update soon. I'm sorry about the problems you had seeing it. I'm not really sure what happened.

* * *

"What are you doing back?" Dan let Nate in.

"It's over" Dan groaned and sat on the couch as Nate collapsed next to him "you must have known though, you leant me your car to make it easier"

"I was hoping you wouldn't go through with it"

"Did she tell you what she was going to do?"

"Nope but she'd mentioned that she was thinking about it a few times. I had a feeling she'd made p her mind after seeing you with Serena."

"It was a mistake. The whole thing was a mistake"

"You mean Serena? Or Blair?"

"Both. I should never have married her."

"You counted down the days until she turned 30 so you could propose and get your mother off the case"

"Yeah but I didn't love her. And I should have known it wouldn't have worked. Blair deserves the marriage where you can't get enough of each other, just not this. "

"But you love her now"

"Yes" Nate slipped up "just as a friend"

"Just admit it" Dan clenched his fist.

"Ok. I love her; I'm in love with Blair Waldorf. I'm pathetic aren't I?"

"You sound just like her"

"What do you mean?"

"You need to go back Nate. Sort things out"

"It's over. I want her to be happy and she's going to be. Just not with me"

"Do I need to spell it out to you both?" Dan leant towards Nate making sure he was listening "You love each other so be together"

"You should see her with Chuck. I was stupid to think she'd ever be over him. They've always had something."

"Until he hurt her, over and over again."

"I didn't want her to hate me" Nate admitted "I didn't even realise I was in love with her until Serena turned up. I was so used to pretending that I didn't notice it had become real. When Serena returned I thought maybe I still loved her but I didn't. I want to be with Blair"

"So be with her"

"And make her unhappy, I can't do that to her"

"You two are the most stubborn and stupid people I've ever met." Dan stood up "I give up"

"Where are you going?"

"To bed"

"Dan I could do with a friend to talk to at the moment"

"Here's an idea, why don't you ring Blair?"

"Thanks" Nate muttered once Dan had gone and he was left alone to convince himself he'd made the right decision.

* * *

Nate followed Serena into her old room and sat down on the chair. Serena sat on the edge of her bed "my mum told me about you and Blair. I'm sorry"

"No you're not"

"I am." Serena sighed "I'm so sorry. I've been so horrible and I never wanted to hurt you or Blair"

"You never give it up do you?" Nate looked around at the bland room "always the innocent act"

"Are you ok?" Serena looked at him closely; he looked like he hadn't slept at all.

"No I'm not ok"

"Nate talk to me. Tell me how you feel. I want to know where I stand" Serena thought back to what she and Nate had nearly done.

"Blair saw us"

"What?"

"She walked in and saw us together and now she's ended things."

"I'm so sorry"

"It's not your fault. It's mine" Nate put his head in his hands "I love her"

"I shouldn't have put pressure on you. I let Chuck brainwash me into thinking we should be together. That we were meant to be and all that rubbish"

"You should never listen to Chuck" Nate managed a smile, it was weird how all of sudden everything had been put into perspective.

"I know that now. When my mum told me you and Blair had broken up I was so ashamed of myself. I just wanted to go and check on Blair. You and I getting together didn't even cross my mind. I feel so stupid. I went out of my way to get you and it was for nothing. I've ruined everything. If you hate me-"

"Don't Serena. We've all been stupid. Maybe this is for the best though. Blair can be with Chuck now. Part of me is thankful because the pressure of keeping this marriage going was really getting to be too much"

"You just said you love her though. You need to fight for her"

"To think yesterday we couldn't keep our hands off each other and now you want me to get Blair back"

"It's like being back in high school again" Serena reached out for Nate's hand "we're ok aren't we?"

"Yeah we are"

"So what are you going to do about Blair?"

"Nothing. I've lost her"

"Since I've been back you and Blair have been acting so weird. I don't know how to explain it. And now you're telling me you love her but you're not gonna fight for her. Is there something more going on? More than me and Chuck"

"It's fake." Nate blurted out "the whole thing was fake"

"What do you mean?" Serena patted the space next to her and Nate joined her on the bed

"Blair and I made this deal years ago. I was upset about you and she was upset about Chuck. You know what Blair's like, she had this whole thing planned. She wanted to be married by 30 so we agreed that if we were both single we'd get married and that's what we did"

"You're joking right?"

"No, I'm not"

"Nate, I-I don't know what to say"

"I wish we hadn't done it."

"Wow. I can't believe it. When did you start to love her then?"

"I think I always have. I convinced myself for so long that we were pretending but it was so easy for us. Living together, being together, all of it. Right until you and Chuck came back and then everything got complicated. I wanted to convince myself I wanted you because it was easier than being in love with Blair. As Blair would say it's not part of the deal"

"If you love her why are you breaking up with her?" Serena tried to get her head round it.

"She still loves Chuck and I can't stop them from being together. It's not fair. She's the most amazing and kind and beautiful person, all I want is for her to be happy."

"You really do love her"

"Yeah haven't I already said that?"

"I know but I can't believe I didn't realise all this was going on. You could have told me"

"Yeah right" Nate scoffed.

"Ok maybe not. But I'm glad you've told me now."

"You won't tell anyone else will you? Blair will kill me if this gets out. She's already upset enough about getting a divorce"

"I won't tell anyone. I promise."

"Thank you Serena"

"If there's anything I can do you'll let me know won't you?"

"Of course I will" Nate leant over and hugged her glad at how easily they had slipped back into a natural friendship. He just hoped it would be as easy with Blair.

* * *

"That's a lot of chocolate" Dan glanced at the table which was full of every kind of chocolate he could think of.

"I'm depressed"

"I guessed by your pyjamas" Blair never stayed in her pyjamas.

"I was meant to be going for drinks with Nate but he never called" Blair took another bite of her chocolate bar "he hates me"

"He doesn't"

"Where is he?"

"I don't know"

"Don't lie to me" Blair threatened.

"He went to see Serena"

"You should have lied" Blair headed to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of wine "life sucks"

"You really don't need wine" Dan tried to pull the glass from her grasp but she managed to pull away.

"I do. I need cheering up"

"That's why I'm here."

"The chocolate hasn't worked so you're my last hope. Then I'm turning to the wine. Deal?"

"Deal" Dan pulled her back to the couch. "Maybe you should ring Nate and organise the drinks"

"No I'm sure he's having fun with Serena. He won't want me to interrupt"

"I think he just went to clear the air"

"Is that what you call it?" Blair raised her eyebrow "no wonder you're single"

"Hey. I've had offers."

"So why are you still single?"

"Because of you and Nate" Dan put his feet up on Blair "you always scare them off. You're so perfect and they hate that I'm best friends with you. Or they meet Nate and fall madly in love with him and decide I'm not good enough"

"I'm sorry" Blair laughed "that's not true"

"It is. You two make me look crap. They always go on about what a perfect husband Nate is and how I'm such a bad boyfriend. I hate that he's such a gentleman"

"Me too" Blair's eyes filled with tears, that was a lie.

"I'm not gonna introduce you guys to any of my future girlfriends until I'm married"

"Then how am I supposed to check out if their good enough for you?"

"I can do it myself"

"You're rubbish at reading people. Georgina, Charlie-"

"Ok you don't need to remind me" Dan watched as Blair tried to blink away her tears "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have mentioned Nate"

"I can't believe what a whimp I'm being. This isn't me."

"I guess that's what love does to you" Dan looked up as they heard a knock "are you expecting someone?"

"No"

"Should I answer it?" Blair nodded and Dan got up to go to the door. "Serena what are you doing here?"

"I need to talk to Blair. Please just let me in" Dan continued to stand there thinking through his decision. He wasn't sure it was a good idea but maybe Serena would be the one to knock some sense into Blair.

"Ok. I'll leave you to it. But be careful"

"Thank you" Serena closed the door behind Dan before going in and joining Blair.

"Where's Dan?"

"He's gone"

"I don't think you should be here"

"I bought ice cream" Serena lifted up the bag in her hand to show Blair "just let me explain"

"Ok" Blair nodded towards the space next to her and Serena made herself comfortable.

"I'm sorry. Nate came to see me. He told me about everything"

"What do you mean by everything?"

"That you saw us together. And that it was fake. He told me about the deal"

"He did? I'm gonna kill him!"

"Blair calm down" Serena passed her a tub of ice cream and spoon "I'm not gonna tell anyone"

"Have you come here to gloat then?"

"Nate doesn't want me. He made that clear today. I'm sorry about everything I've done since I've been back. You're my best friend and I've been trying to steal your husband"

"So you're finally admitting it?"

"I really am sorry"

"So am I" Blair took a mouthful of ice cream "I haven't exactly been a good friend. I should have supported you. You're obviously still upset about James."

"I didn't deserve your support. I've messed with you and Nate so much. I put myself before you and I nearly slept with your husband"

"Fake husband"

"He was still your husband. Is your husband" Serena took the ice cream from Blair and placed it on the table "I don't think it's all fake"

"Maybe you're right. Did you say that Nate didn't want you?" Blair thought back to the beginning of the conversation.

"Yeah we talked through everything. He doesn't have feelings for me and I don't have feelings for him. We thought we did or we wanted to because it would make things easier. He loves you Blair"

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah. Me and Nate are over for good"

"I can't believe it. I broke up with him because I thought he loved you. I wanted him to be happy" Blair groaned, she hated her life sometimes "does he really love me?"

"He does"

"Dan's been trying to tell me but I didn't believe him"

"Do you love him too?" Serena noticed Blair's tears.

"Yeah I do" Blair wiped her face and smiled "what am I going to do?"

"Win him back?" Serena took hold of Blair's hand "he broke up with you so you could be with Chuck"

"We've both been so stupid"

"I guess we all have" Serena wiped Blair's tears away "you should go and see him"

"Actually Nate can wait. If he really loves me he'll still love me tomorrow" Blair hugged Serena "I'm in the mood for a girly sleepover"

"You are?"

"We have a lot of talking to do. We've been best friends for so long and I've only just realised how much I've missed you. I need you"

"I need you too" Serena felt her own tears escape "I'm so sorry for everything I've ever done to hurt you. Sometimes I just loose it and I let all these stupid thoughts and feelings take over. I only care about myself."

"I know you. You're just scared to admit how upset and lost you are. If I'd just stopped being jealous for a second I would have seen that"

"It's not your fault" Serena hugged Blair again "I love you B"

"I love you too S"


	11. Chapter 11

I'm so sorry it's took me so long to update! I've been so busy with work and I've just finished college and have my exams soon so it's been so hard to find the time to write. This is the last chapter so I just want to thank everyone that's read it and reviewed!

* * *

Blair waited for Chuck to open his motel door, she wanted to go and see Nate but she needed to sort things out with Chuck first.

"Hey" he let her in "I'm guessing you're here to talk about France"

"Yeah I see you're already packed" Blair looked around at his suitcases.

"I didn't really unpack much in the first place. I wasn't planning on staying here for long" Chuck poured himself a drink "you're not coming are you?" he asked straight to the point.

"I'm sorry. I loved you back then, I really did. But it wasn't healthy. You hurt me so much and I promised I would never go back there again. I moved on"

"With Nate"

"With Nate" Blair repeated her feelings of nerves and excitement returning at the thought of seeing him that afternoon.

"I never meant to hurt you"

"I know we never meant to hurt each other but we always do" Blair was thinking of Nate and Serena as well.

"Serena rang me before you came. She told me everything about you and Nate"

"She promised she wouldn't tell anyone" Blair sulked.

"I don't really count do I. Remember when we used to tell each other everything"

"We never judge" Blair smiled as the memories came back

"And then things got complicated. We should have all just stayed friends; it would have made things easier"

"If Nate hadn't slept with Serena, if I hadn't got in that limo with you" Blair sat down on the bed "I don't regret any of that. We had our happy times. I regret that we didn't make it. We were best friends"

"You and Serena made it. And Nate."

"That's because me and Serena talked through everything last night. And we're ok. It's just you and Nate"

"He's got Humphrey now"

"You know you might actually like him if you gave him a chance"

"Too bad I'm leaving tomorrow so we won't find out"

"Tomorrow?"

"Evening"

"Well why don't you come for breakfast tomorrow at mine"

"Will Humphrey be there?" Blair nodded "no way"

"Please Chuck. I want to get things sorted between us all again. We've been through too much to leave it like this" Blair pouted up at him knowing he could never say no.

"Fine"

"It'll be just like old times"

* * *

Blair knocked on Dan's door nervously and waited for Nate to answer, she'd made sure Dan would be out "Blair, hi, what are you doing here?" he led her in.

"I thought we needed to talk"

"I'm all talked out" Nate thought back to the past month, all he'd done was talk, about his feelings, what he wanted. He missed his life when it was easy and he and Blair joked about every day, now he couldn't get through a day without being asked who he loved, Serena or Blair? "You're mum rang me"

"She did" Blair raised her eyebrow and perched on the stool as she watched Nate make her a hot chocolate with cream. He didn't even need to ask if she wanted one, she looked stressed and hot chocolate always made her feel better.

"She wanted to know what was going on. She said I was mad to let you go" Nate passed Blair her drink and sat on the stool next to her "she doesn't think you're coping"

"She wouldn't know. I haven't spoken to her since I rang to tell her we were getting a divorce. I'm offended that she thinks I can't cope by myself"

"She's just worried about you"

"I didn't come here to talk about my mum" Blair sipped her drink and instantly felt better "I miss you already and you've only just left."

"I miss you too but we'll get used to it" Nate turned away but Blair had already seen the look of hope in his eyes, he wanted to come back.

"Serena came over last night"

"So that's why you're here. You want me to help you hide her body"

"You're so funny Nate" Blair rolled her eyes "we actually sorted things out. We talked through everything and admitted how much we needed each other"

"You talked through everything?" Nate looked at her in alarm, he knew what Blair and Serena were like when they were best friends, they didn't keep secrets.

"I don't want Chuck"

"You made it obvious that you do Blair."

"How?"

"You went back to his after the reunion"

"Because I was angry with you"

"You kissed him"

"He kissed me and it was easier than fighting him"

"I heard him tell you he loves you"

"I didn't say it back"

"Because you felt guilty about me"

"Because I don't love him"

"You broke up with me"

"So you could be with Serena" Blair sighed "for someone who knows me so well you really did read the whole situation so wrong"

"So did you" Nate defended himself "I don't want to be with Serena"

"You gave me more reasons to think that"

"Like what?" Nate asked without thinking.

"You invited her to live with us"

"I felt sorry for her"

"You spent all your time with her"

"I was trying to be a good friend"

"You ditched me for her at the reunion"

"It was just easier being with her. Less lying and faking"

"You said you'd always choose me but really you always pick Serena" Nate didn't say anything "you kissed her" Blair looked up trying to stop herself from crying, maybe they were wrong, maybe it was Serena he loved after all "you wanted a divorce"

"To make you happy. I wanted you to be happy"

"Well I'm not" Blair finished her drink and stood up, she'd made a mistake by coming to see him.

"Blair wait, let me explain" Nate grabbed her arm, he had to tall her the truth before it was too late "it was easier being with Serena"

"You're really not making me feel any better" Blair yanked her arm away.

"Please Blair, just sit down, I don't want to loose you"

"You'll never loose me, not completely anyway" she loved him too much to stay away.

"You deserve the truth" Nate watched her as she made her way to the couch and sat down before following "I spent all that time with Serena because it was easier than being with you. Around you I had to be careful what I did, I had to make sure I didn't give away how I felt. It used to be easy, the faking and the lying because I didn't realise how I really felt. But then Serena and Chuck came back and I couldn't pretend anymore. I started to question things, question you. Did you mean that as a friend, a fake wife or just maybe did you have feelings for me too?" Blair opened her mouth to interrupt but Nate stopped her "just listen to me" she nodded "with Chuck back on the scene and all the arguing I convinced myself I still had feelings for Serena. That's why I let her kiss me. But I stopped things from going further because she wasn't you" Nate stopped for a breath "I only wanted a divorce because I thought you would be happier with Chick. I didn't want you to hate me. I love you Blair" they sat in silence for a while "you can talk now Blair" she didn't "Blair will you just say something" he was starting to panic now "stop staring at me. I'm sorry I shouldn't have said anything. It's freaked you out and-"

"Don't move" Blair placed a hand on Nate to stop him from standing "I'm trying to memorize this moment" Blair grinned "I can't believe you actually said it. Say it again"

"Which bit?"

"Don't be stupid, you know which bit"

"I love you" Nate couldn't stop himself from smiling this time, it felt so good to finally tell her even if she didn't feel the same.

"I love you too"

"You do?"

"I've wanted to tell you for so long but I was so scared of ruining things. You're my best friend and-" Nate cut her off by crushing his lips to hers "I should have told you ages ago" their kisses were different, neither of them were holding back. "Nate stop kissing me" Blair tried to push him away but he just pulled her onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her so she couldn't get away "stop it" she laughed "we need to talk about what we're going to do now"

"What do you mean? I'll move back in and we'll carry on as normal except this time it will be real"

"Don't you think it's a bit soon for us to be living together?"

"Soon? We're married Blair"

"You know what I mean"

"I don't want to waste any more time. We know we work living together, you're the best housemate I've ever had"

"It will be different now thought" Blair allowed him to kiss her, she couldn't resist him.

"It will be even better. I love you Blair. It was always supposed to be me and you and now it is"

"I love you too. Now let's go home"

* * *

Nate crept up behind Blair and slid his arms around her waist "hey wife"

"Hey husband" Blair turned around in his arms and pressed her lips to his, she'd never felt happier."

"Hey friends" Serena nudged Blair "cut it out"

"I don't like burnt sausages" Dan threw a napkin at Nate "stop distracting her"

"I still can't believe Blair's cooking and I'm actually going to eat it" Chuck said from where he was sat at the table with Dan.

"I'm quite good" Blair smirked and pushed Nate away as she turned back around to help Serena.

"We'll see. If I survive this maybe when you all come to visit me in France you can cook for us there"

"All of us?" Dan raised an eyebrow.

"You're all welcome" Blair smiled at Chuck thankfully; she knew that this was his peace offering and she also knew how hard it was for him. Chuck stood up and followed Nate through to the living room "Nate I just want to say sorry. I-"

"Let's just forget about it. I'm glad we're all friends again" Nate slapped him on the back before reaching for the photo album he and Blair had left on the couch.

"What's that?" Chuck asked as they returned to the table and the girls placed the food down for them.

"Me and Nate stayed up late last night going through all our old photos and we made a photo album. Have a look" Serena was the first to grab it and flicked through telling the others what type of pictures were in it.

"Nate and Blair's first date, the first time me and Blair wore make up, first day at school" she opened it up further on "the pool party"

"Which nearly got us chucked out of school" Dan still hadn't forgiven them for that.

"Blair's birthday"

"The one where Jenny got attacked by Chuck"

"Don't exaggerate it Humphrey"

"The day me and Blair stole Eleanor's clothes and did our own photo shoot, the white party, prom" Serena flicked to the back "my wedding"

"We hope you don't mind is putting it in there. It was such a big part of your life-"

"It's beautiful." Serena smiled before turning the page "Dan and some random girl"

"That was my longest relationship. Then she broke up with me because she was in love with Nate" the group laughed.

"Blair and Nate's wedding, the reunion" Serena shut it "the rest is empty"

"It's for all of us. Whenever something good or big happens we take a picture and put it in there. Just to remind us of everything we've been through and how we've made it"

"You're so soppy Blair" Chuck rolled his eyes but he had to admit it was a good idea.

"So this picture is next" Nate grabbed his camera and set it up and they all jumped together posing.

"And then you need to send us a picture once you get to France Chuck" Blair warned him as she tucked into her food.

"I will"

"And then we'll see where life takes us" Blair grinned at Nate, as long as she was with him she didn't care where she ended up.


End file.
